Corned Beef and Ennui

By Gordon Hopkins Happy Corned Beef and Cabbage Day!I try not to let St. Patrick's Day go unacknowledged in this column, especially when it happens to fall on publication day. Only, what else have I got to say on the subject? I logged onto Facebook this morning and the first thing that popped up was one of those memory thingies. Seven years ago today I first posted that picture of Blarney Castle in County Cork, from my trip to Ireland. I've re-posted it every St. Patrick's Day since, for no reason other than it happens to be St. Patrick's Day and Facebook won't let me forget. It is also the same picture I've used multiple times in my past St. Patrick's Day columns.I may be getting a tad weary of this holiday.Don't get me wrong, I enjoy St. Patrick's Day as much as the next guy. I enjoy the following day more than the next guy since, not being a big drinker, I probably won't have a hangover, unlike the next guy. Still, trying to come up with something new to write about this morning is proving to be difficult. I am, shall we say, uninspired.Perhaps St. Patrick's Day lost some of its cache for me when the McDonald's in town closed down. Honestly, I can't justify driving all the way to Beatrice for a Shamrock Shake.I tried a bit of web surfing for inspiration. “Ten Things You Didn't Know About St. Patrick's Day.” “Bizarre Facts About St. Patrick's Day.” “Everything You Wanted to Know About St. Patrick's Day But Were Afraid to Ask.” That sort of thing. Only, it doesn't seem to be working.All those “amazing facts” are things I already knew, don't care about or don't believe. For example, one internet “listicle” tells me the real reason why we all wear green on St. Patrick's Day is that's the color Catholics wore in the Great Irish Rebellion of 1641 as they fought to put an end to Protestant rule in Kilkenny. Okay, that's a nice little factoid but it really doesn't answer the question: why green?I became intrigued. This was exactly what I needed to get my columnist's juices flowing. A mystery to solve.Unfortunately, it didn't take long before I lost interest. I found one answer to my question which was, frankly, so dumb, that I just stopped looking for fear I might find something even dumber.So why do we all wear green for St. Patrick's Day? Why did the Great Irish Rebellion wear green? According to “Answers to Your St. Patrick's Day Questions,” published on USA Today's website, of all places, green supposedly makes you invisible to leprechauns.First of all, I don't believe that for a second. Secondly, true or false, it is easily the dumbest thing I have read this week.You know what? I just can't think of anything else to write about. Don't be surprised if, next year, I just let the holiday pass without comment.Just to kill space, here are some pictures of my green typewriters.

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