Fear and Loathing in Oz

By Gordon Hopkins Don't try and tell me this isn't going to end up being a movie.Of course, you can't make the movie until you have the denouement. Well, it looks like we are getting pretty close.The story began in 2005. No, wait. I guess it really began in 1939, when the Technicolor cinema landmark, “The Wizard of Oz,” came out. Actually, to be technically accurate, we should begin in 1900, when L. Frank Baum first gave the world his book, “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz.”Nope. I don't wanna go back that far. Let's start at 2005 after all. That was when the most famous pair of shoes in the world were stolen from the Judy Garland Museum in Grand Rapids, Minnesota.Obviously I am talking about the red, sparkly ruby slippers worn by Garland in the movie. The same shoes that the protagonist of the movie, Dorothy Gale, clicked together three times so that she could be returned to the sepia-toned world of Kansas.My columns tend to be littered with irrelevant asides because I have a hard time resisting the inclusion of trivia. A lot of people know that, in the book, the slippers were not red but silver. Unless you have actually read the book, you may not realize the shoes were actually designed in an Arabian style with sharp pointy toes and Mary Jane type buckles. Not exactly haute couture. Sometimes changes from the book are a good thing. I mean, shoes covered in rubies is gauche enough but those silver monstrosities would make a fashionista weep.More trivia, there was a prototype of the ruby slippers not used in the movie that featured curly toes. Those were bought by Debbie Reynolds.Anyway, let me get back on track. Stolen in 2005 as I said, they were recovered in a sting operation in Minneapolis in 2018. A man named Terry Martin now in his 70's, was charged with the crime.Last year, Martin pleaded guilty. The aging thief, now in extremely poor health and, by some accounts, dying, reportedly wanted to pull off “one last score.”According to his attorney, Martin apparently believed the slippers were actually covered in rubies. He received no prison time due to his ill health. Personally, I think he should consider himself lucky. If dumb were a crime, he might have gotten the chair.For the record, the shoes are covered not in valuable red gems but in sequins painted red. Nevertheless, the estimated value to the footwear is approximately $3.5 million. That's not a bad markup for a pair of pumps, glue, red paint and a handful of sequins.Martin learned his mistake when he tried to fence the shoes and found they were naught but costume jewelry.Here is another bit of unnecessary trivia. The shoes stolen were actually mismatched. Several pair were made for the movie.Inside the shoes, ‘Judy Garland's’ was written inside the shoes, along with a number. One of the shoes was #1 and the other #6. If your are wondering, the other #1 and #6 were at the Smithsonian.Anyway, that's not the end of the story. Like any good heist flick, there has to be a last-minute twist.Last week another man, Jerry Hal Saliterman, was also charged with the theft. Unlike his alleged partner in crime, Saliterman maintains his innocence.Exactly how the FBI hunted down the wayward footwear has yet to be revealed. I can say this: It will make one heck of a book, which I will buy and read. I will also go see the inevitable movie.

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