Would You Like Human Interaction with Your Fries? (That Costs Extra)

By Gordon Hopkins Do you know someone who thinks ketchup goes on everything? We all know someone like that.AI (Artificial Intelligence) is the new ketchup. There are some folks out there that want to pour AI onto absolutely everything. Now, they want to put it in your burger. The Burger King restaurant chain is testing out a new AI chatbot. It is called “Patty,” (Get it?), which I’m sure some marketing wonk thought was incredibly witty. The purported purpose of this AI is to managed inventory, kitchen tasks, equipment maintenance and operational support.However, most news outlets that have reported on this development have focused on just one of “Patty’s” duties. It will monitor the interaction between drive-thru employees and customers to “evaluate their interactions with customers for ‘friendliness,’” according to The Verge. A virtual eavesdropper or, if you prefer, a virtual spy. “It is not designed to track nor evaluate employees saying specific words or phrases,” one Burger King spokesperson assures us. “It’s not about scoring individuals or enforcing scripts. It’s about reinforcing great hospitality and giving managers helpful, real-time insights so they can recognize their teams more effectively.”To BK, I say BS.George Orwell warned us Big Brother would be watching. He didn’t tell us Big Brother would be a robot.Many, many moons ago, when I was fresh out of college, I cut my teeth in the job market working for the calls centers that were once ubiquitous in Omaha, before outsourcing took those terrible, terrible jobs overseas. Of course, the phone calls I and my fellow sweat shop slaves, uh, I mean employees, were monitored. We were expected to follow a script, use certain words or phrases and, of course, upsell. If we didn’t, we were chastised, penalized and, if it happened again, terminated. That kind of thing engenders an environment of paranoia and misery. It is one of the main reasons calls center jobs have such a high turnover rate.Fast-food jobs aren’t exactly known as happy, low-stress, fun-time occupations either. I can’t imagine “Patty” doing anything but making the working environment even more miserable.The big question now is, will all the other fast-food chains follow suit? I am now going to put on my Criswell hat once again and make a prediction. Most, if not all, other chains WILL adopt their own AI Big Brothers. The result will drive away scores of workers already fed up with long hours, low wages, heat and abusive customers.With the resulting staff shortage cited as the reason, fast-food chains will do away with order-taking humans altogether. Conveniently, an AI will already be in place, requiring very little modification, to handle the order-taking process. Soon, when you drive up to a restaurant and give your order for a burger, fries and drink to that echoing intercom, there won’t be a person at the other end at all. There will just be “Patty.” Of course, there will still be flesh-and-blood employees, but they will be in the back, preparing your food, unseen by the customers. At least, until the burger-making robots are perfected.

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