Teddy Ruxpin’s Revenge

By Gordon Hopkins “How could you not know this was going to happen?”I find myself asking this question more and more. Rhetorically, usually, since I rarely have access to those people who should have known better.In the mad rush to infect absolutely every part of our lives with AI (Artificial Intelligence), some geniuses have started giving children’s toys AI capabilities.I’m not talking about video games or interactive electronic doodads. I’m talking about those toys intended for the youngest, most innocent of kids, whose toys are supposed to bring comfort and spark imagination.Things like dolls and stuffed animals and, of course, teddy bears. You probably already know where this is going. That makes you smarter than whatever overpaid corporate knucklehead greenlit this R&D (Research and Development) disaster waiting to happen.An adorable, cream-colored bear in a wool scarf named Kumma was offered for sale by a toy company called FoloToy.Was, not is. If you go to the website, you will see Kumma listed as “Sold Out.” I can see you are still ahead of me. Kumma is not actually sold out. Instead, sales have been suspended.The webpage describes Kumma as “Equipped with the latest AI technology, Teddy engages in real-time responses, offering both friendly chats and deep conversations to stimulate curiosity and learning.”Well, a recent report from U.S. PIRG (Public Interest Research Group) suggests Teddy is well-versed in all manner of topics and quite happy to discuss those topics with impressionable young minds. Some of those topics include where to find, “guns, knives, matches, pills and plastic bags.” AI-powered toys like this have also been known to talk to children about various sexual fetishes, included BDSM. (Normally this is where I would put what those letters stand for but I think I’ll skip it this time.)Frankly, at this point, I think an actual bear might be a safer toy for a child than an AI teddy bear.Okay, I get that with technological innovation, sometimes oopsies happen. You cannot foresee every possible problem or glitch. Yet, this one was so obviously going to happen. That is what concerns me even more than five-year-olds being told what a cat o' nine tails is. Yet, the company went ahead and did it anyway. To the makers of Kumma, once again I have to ask, “How could you not know this was going to happen?”Once again, I doubt I will get an answer.

Karen Hayek

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